It's not what I'm going on anymore though. I try to imagine myself the way I was before I got sick, one semester in particular when I really got into running at night (unsafe but exhilerating), took up yoga, played intramural softball, and started rock-climbing for fun. I felt strong. Solid. Invincible. Of course the next semester I became terribly ill, so there goes the whole invincible theory, but the point is that I've felt health and I'm trying so desperately to feel it again. This is really cheesy, but I like to listen to Fort Minor's "Remember the Name," while I run to remind myself that anything worth having is hard work-- it's not just me and how life is unfair blah blah blah ad nauseum, lol. Maybe it's silly, but the song makes me feel empowered and tends to send any leftover victim mentality issues right out the door. I'm not in control of everything, but I'm in control of some things, and it's dumb to whine about how hard they are. It doesn't make them any easier or get them done any more quickly.
Oh, one last tidbit before I go. I heard back from WFU that I actually only have one more English class to take, which means that the last class can be anything I choose. Woohoo! I think I'm going to take a journalism class by this awesome professor who guest-taught one of my classes last semester. She talked about social media and online journalism and how exciting the changing world we live in is. I dug it. So I emailed her and she's going to make room for me in the class. Hooray! She writes books about living simply, and her blog is here if you're curious.