Thursday, July 8, 2010
Oh, blogging, why are you so difficult right now?
It's been over two months since I've posted, and you know the old adage: No news is good news. Unfortunately, this counts as news, so- you guessed it- I'm sick again. I don't really have any details. I haven't called the doctor yet and I don't know how long it will last, but I've been feeling bad for the last five days and it's been getting progressively worse each day. It could just be a stomach bug, but having been chronic for so long, I'm definitely a bit overly-anxious these days!
And honestly, I'm having some issues with the lines between blog life and real life. As I start to step back into the fold of... what? The rest of the world? Normal-paced living? Something like that. Anyway, I've been feeling better, starting to move faster and see more people on a normal basis, and I'm just really cautious about being that girl who over-shares. Because this blog is publicly attached to me, anyone can find me, and some of my more avid followers include my mom, my aunt and cousin in Ohio, and my little sisters. So when things happen that I want to blog about-- like my penchant for being approached by only engaged/married/divorced men in bars or the difficulty in differentiating between hangover-sick and beginning-of-crash-sick-- I generally decide against the risk. I'm not really sure what to do with that right now.
Basically, it's hard being single, young, and sick. Or should it be "BUT sick," in a way that kind of cancels out any dateability or friendability points gained by the first two factors? It's weird. I haven't worked in awhile, I'm not in school full-time, and I've been house-bound for the past couple years. Soooo my social circle has shrunk quite a bit. I love the people I know, but I worry about strangling them with my neediness, especially now that I've hit that 3-month post-relationship loneliness huddle.
So that's what's going on. I have lots of thoughts and no idea what the rules are for Internet-sharing. I'm trying not to let the Internet get in the way of all the things I need to start doing (part-time job, sign up for classes, start searching for a real career...), and I'm starting to have a little trouble staying sane through it all. Of course, my body went ahead and slowed things down for me, so thanks for that, body. Way to hold it down. Or something.
Anyway, how do you guys decide how much to share? I mean, really, if the point of doing this is getting to know people (thus showing my true self), being real, and you know, staying sane, how do you share what you want without cringing at the thought of your mom or distant friend or ex reading it?
Also, in unrelated news: I'm watching an E! Special on Justin Bieber and COMPLETELY developing Bieber fever. I just want to put him in my pocket for whenever I get sad. So cute! In a completely legal and appropriate way, thanks. :)